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Healthier, Happier Relationships through Therapy

Therapy services to support creating happier, healthier relationships for our LGBTQ+ Community. Same-sex relationships, gender-agnostic relationships, gender-queer, fluid, aromatic, monogamous, non-monogamous, open, closed and 47 types of queer relationship attributes, all deserve therapeutic support from within our own community when things are going badly! 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

LGBTCoupleCounselling.co.uk is a distinct, exclusive therapy service – from counsellors like us – to partners like you.

LGBTCoupleCounselling.co.uk would be the considered choice for same-sex & mixed-sexuality couples, groups, or anyone within our LGBTQ Community seeking therapeutic help. It’s a service that facilitates improvements in your most precious relationship, using skills you already have! LGBT/QIA+ couples and polyamorous groups work with Dean Richardson MNCPS (Accred/Reg) because of his background, therapeutic approach, and years of experience, now into his 25th year. His knowledge and comprehension of lesbians, gay men, bisexuals, asexuals, aromatics, and polyamorous relationships can feel very reassuring.

5-Star Customer Reviews of LGBT Couple Counselling

These are relationship therapy services that are gender agnostic, non-pathologising, and social-constructivist agnostic.

Using video technology, this therapy service reaches gay relationships across the whole of the UK. A service that’s supportive and effective and uses the free video app technology you already have in your pocket, in your home, the office, in the car, on a hike… wherever works well for you.

Historically, Dean’s office / face-to-face practice in mental health therapy has been centred in the South of England (Hampshire, Sussex, Dorset). Yet, using secure video app technology, his counselling practice reaches gay & lesbian couples nationwide across the whole UK.

Specialised mental and emotional health services for couples and groups, regularly working with couples from Scotland, Wales, Ireland, and counties in England such as Yorkshire, Merseyside, Greater Manchester, and Sussex.

Long after the nation’s Lockdowns had ended, Dean’s useful LGBT+ relationship therapy services continued to be available using real-time video conferencing. A handy solution using your existing Smartphone or computer devices with Zoom, Skype, Google Meet etc.

When LGBTQ+ relationships were looking for the best therapy service for their specific needs, they arrived  here – congratulations 🎉 – this is the therapy you were looking for!

Specialist Therapist

Dean Richardson MNCPS (Accred/Reg) is a specialist counsellor, focussing on the needs of LGBT/QIA+ couple, throuple & group relationships.

Dean’s therapeutic approach to same sex, mixed or queer relationships specifically addresses concerns for lesbian, gay, bi, trans and queer partners (unlike the more general relationship counsellors).

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Relationship Therapies

Whilst we use effective therapies from over 50 years of counselling research, we apply these exclusively to modern-day LGBTQ+ needs.

We’ll consider circular behaviour patterns to invite newer ways of behaviour and communication. Newer options and choices to invite falling back in love.

We’ll go at your pace, together.

LGBTQ+ Community

Suitable for a gay men, lesbian woman, bisexual, same-sex and queer adult couples and established groups: intimate, marital, business or social.

Plus  mixed sexuality / mixed-gender intimate relationships.

Together we will look at the root of your relationship’s problems, and learn how to address conflicts, aiming to make counselling dispensable.

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Unrestricted Time

Your intimate relationship has no set time period, so neither does this private Relationship Therapy Service.

You’ll not be restricted to 6-or-12 sessions (like GPs, NHS or Charities). Neither will you be introduced to months of unending therapy.

Sessions are weekly & scheduled right from the start so there’ll be no dairy conflicts.

High Acceptance, Low Dissatisfaction Rates

FACTS: a majority of Dean's new clients return for a second session (and more...)*1

Our counselling relationship begins with an initial evaluation session (you evaluate me, and I evaluate if you might work well with my approach). In our first session, we will have some conversations and decide whether this early experience appears to have been beneficial enough to continue working together. Sometimes, extra evaluation sessions are agreed upon to help make a more informed decision, but this has been regularly unnecessary.

Two measurements highlight how people respond overall to my style of counselling: Acceptance Rate*2 and Dissatisfaction Rate*3.

During the previous twelve months (June 2023 to May 2024) my Case Measurement Rates have been:-

Acceptance Rate:
98.00%
Dissatisfaction Rate:
2.00%

*1) measuring over the last twelve full months.
*2) the percentage of clients who continued to attend sessions (for at least one month) after their initial session(s). NB: some clients complete their work in a shorter time than one month; others find that a longer path benefits them.
*3) the percentage of clients who, from their experience of the initial session, felt that the service was not what they were looking for.

The average number of sessions per case is not included here. Because one client's needs differ greatly from another's, a fair comparison cannot be made. No figures are included where the clients were satisfied with the initial session and decided that this was sufficient.

Zoom / Skype Video Counselling for LGBT Couples

Services that Meet your Needs

TL;DR? Consider which therapy service most suits your relationship needs. Not just any gay relationship, but yours specifically.

Then, get in touch with Dean, and we’ll talk about what you need before setting up our first therapy session.

The first session will be about an overview of what relationship matters we’re going to address, and how we’re going to work together (e.g. your worries, concerns, needs, etc). A sort of: “setting the direction from within the middle of the wood” if you like.

Range of LGBTQ+ Relationship Therapies

Relationship Therapy for LGBTQ+ Couples.

Where a couple can work on their couple relationship together.

Relationship Therapy for LGBTQ+ Throuples .

Where an intimate triad can work on their relationship together.

Relationship Therapy for Polyamory / Non-Monogamous Groups.

Where an LGBTQIA++  non-monogamous or polyamorous group gets to work on the problems within their intimate group dynamics.

Sexual Engagement Therapy for LGTBQ+.

Where an LGBTQ+ identifying individual, couple or group get to work on sexual matters.

Open Relationship Therapy for LGTBQ+.

Where an LGBTQ+ identifying individual, couple or group can look at their needs from – and maybe difficulties from within – an open relationship.

Help with Relationship Separation / Breakups.

Where an LGBTQ+ relationship can work through the matters resulting from a breakup or a necessary separation.

Therapy for Civil-Partnerships & Gay Marriages.

Where marriages and civil-partnerships can find therapeutic help for their distress.

Online Video Therapy for Gay Couples.

LGBTQIA+ couples work through relationship conflicts through working with their counsellor over video conferencing.

Plus, other pages of information particular to LGBT Couple & Intimate Group needs:-

Brief Description of Relationship Therapy

It may be helpful to understand this approach to relationship therapy. There are four main steps, listed here:-

(a) Discovering the Focus for our Work

A couple might believe they already know what’s wrong with their relationship. Through conversation with a professional, though, we may be able to gain a deeper understanding of the relationship system. The more granular our understanding, the more accurately we can target our work. Our focus might be simply to support the couple or group in comprehending recurring patterns of behaviour. It could be about aiding a couple or group intending to start (or end) a relationship. The focus could be anything… and anything the relationship wishes to bring to the table for discussion is welcome.

(b) Working with the Focus

Once we’ve elected on the focus, we’ll start learning more about how your relationship manages this focus. We will find out what works and what doesn’t work.

You’ll usually begin each session by bringing up the most pressing issue that has developed since the last one. Sometimes, though, the topic you bring will follow on from our last session. At other times, we will begin with a new topic (or even a random one). It all comes out in the wash.

(c) Supporting Changes to the Focus

If part (b) is about discovering new information, such new information (see later*) can lead to a change in what the relationship wants to achieve with each other.

We will support this by discussing, clarifying, and incorporating the change into our work.

(d) Bringing Therapy to a Close

When the main goal of therapy has been reached to the point where the couple, throuple or group can continue with the work alone (without the therapist), we will make plans to say goodbye.

You will continue your relationship work alone, using helpful approaches that you have discovered, developed, and built during our time in therapy.

*We work the above stages effectively by making use of, at its core, the therapeutic approach developed by the original Milan Associates (aka Systemic Family Counselling Research) as follows:

Taking Things One Step at a Time

An overview of how LGBT relationship counselling works, starts with encouraging curiosity…

  1. Curiosity (initiated through Counselling)… leading to  →  New Information.
  2. New Information… leading towards  →  New Options.
  3. New Options… leading towards  →  Negotiating / Making New Choices.
  4. New Choices… leading towards  →  Transforming the Relationship (through informed empowerment).
  5. Transformation Underway… the partners are developing affective behaviours that address relationship conflicts (and may choose to leave counselling).

Curiosity allows us to discover new knowledge. New information provides us (and our partners) with new possibilities, which leads to us making some new (or newer) relationship decisions. When new decisions are made, the behaviour of the partnership can begin to change. When the partners' relationship is much more under their own management (again), they will recognise it's time to leave counselling.

Unlimited or a Set Number of Sessions

Some mental health charities and NHS facilities only let you come for a strictly limited number of sessions. This limit may be 6 sessions; sometimes more, sometimes fewer. Unfortunately, this can mean that you will end counselling before your full requirements have been addressed.

There is no artificial number of sessions set by this counselling service! You can attend for as long or as short as therapy is helping. Dean's effective therapy methods come from his private practice, not from a service run by a third party, and he asks you to commit to coming every week until you feel that the work has been done enough to end counselling.

Adding Session-limits

After we have established our counselling work, you may wish to discuss the number of sessions that you want to attend. This might help with budgeting, your availability, or managing new issues that have come up in counselling. Together, we can discuss potential changes before they happen so that everyone can make an informed decision.

The therapeutic needs of the relationship are the most important thing, here. Your financial concerns are important, and they can be addressed within the context of what counselling offers you.

Gay Couple Walking Away after Counselling is Complete

Is Counsellor Dean Right for You?

As an impressively experienced therapist, for some they picked Dean’s distinct service because of his 24+ years of expertise. For others, it was his 17 years of working as a video counsellor (long before others made a fast run towards offering the service during 2019 onwards…🤷🏻‍♂️).

For some it was his accredited registration with the National Counselling Society that demonstrated his expertise. Others appreciated the fact that he was a British counsellor as opposed to the unsatisfactory overseas “counseling” (sic!) services that some had experienced through social media.

For a number of younger gay male couples, it was Dean being an Elder Gay (“we wanted a gay therapist who was older”). For some lesbian couples it was Dean’s gender & sexual identification (“we experienced him as non-threatening”).

LGBT Counselling over Video

For those referred to him, it was his application of the 50+ years of integrated psychodynamic & systemic/”family systems” therapeutic frameworks. Therapy service techniques that helps couples to communicate successfully again, breaking old “stuck” patterns of behaviour.

However you regard Dean’s experience, approach, age, regional accent (Yorkshire!) or variable hair colour (currently “purple streaks” 😁👱🏻‍♂️) when seeking a mental health services for your relationship you’ll be making the right decision for you and your distinct partnership. 

A UK Nationwide Specialist

As a specialist relationship therapist working with lesbian, gay, and mixed-sexuality couples and groups, Dean’s experience spans more than 24 years. His services for the LGBTQ+ Community include a summary of the following aspects:-

Specialist Gay Relationship Therapist

When working in his Portsmouth Practices, Dean was the only actual gay couple and group private counsellor in the Hampshire Region 😁.

Things are a little now that he accesses gay couples from through out the UK via video counselling.

Even so, sexuality isn’t enough to promote ones self as a counsellor for LGBT/QIA+ couple and group relationships.

In addition to his formal qualifications, Dean studies the psychological and therapeutic needs of lesbian, gay, bisexual and aromatic individuals within gender-variant couple and groups in both short- and long-term relationships.

It’s part of his choice as his specialised area and continued professional development.

Whilst some other counsellors may be perfectly happy to work with generic heteronormative relationships, Dean would be the counsellor to consider particularly for LGBT/QIA+ sexuality & gender identification needs… and beyond.

Systemic Psychodynamic LGBT/QIA+ Couple Therapy

Psychodynamic counselling takes certain principals from Freud, Jung, Klein, Winnicott, Bion and so on.

I believe that there is a conscious part of our minds, and an unconscious part.

Sometimes these parts are in sync, and sometimes they are in conflict. Unconscious conflict can produce stress and distressing behaviour in our lives and a psychodynamic approach to counselling (gently) gets to understand the conflict (brings the unconscious into the conscious) giving you choices and feeling less at the mercy of the stuff going on.

In a relationship, unconscious processes can become “acted out” and even passed between the couple (one person’s fears becoming played out by the other partner).

I help the couple become interested in the processes that occur between them by using a systemic approach to therapy.

Interest can lead to knowledge, and knowledge leads to noticing a difference, and that difference is your relationship.

With knowledge and recognition of differences, we can learn what relationship behaviour is asking for, and decide how to supply it.

Brief/Focussed Therapy

Brief/Focal counselling attempts to employ sound counselling principals, but in a much more concentrated and swift way.

In the case of LGBT Couple Counselling, we will spend several sessions learning what should the focus of couple counselling be.

It can be a welcome process for many couples, to learn what is really happening between them and their partner. With such knowledge, the couple can be less helpless.

Once we’re comfortable understanding the focus of work this relationship needs to address, the clients can decide to discontinue regular counselling and work on the relationship focus alone. Alternatively, the clients may continue to meet with the counsellor to work through the matters that the focus brings up.

Domestic Abuse

Dean works with lesbian and gay couples to who find themselves in an abusive relationship (whether the abuse is emotional, physical, or both).

In counselling, the abuse may be looked at in some ways that the couple could initially find unusual (eg moving away from a stereotypical “it’s all their fault / I’m completely innocent” position to better understand what fuels the abuse in this distinct relationship).

We’ll discuss some rules and put into practice “A Safety Plan” (a way for the couple to instantly halt behaviour that’s on a path to repeating further abuse).

We’ll then work together to understand what the abusive behaviour may be attempting to communicate between the couple. With comprehension comes choice, and with choice we can alter the behaviour.

This approach requires all partners to participate in the developing the process together.

Sex and Sexuality

Dean works with sex and sexuality in LGBT couple relationships.

Whilst we’re still not being taught anything about gay or lesbian sex or sexuality in schools, we’re left to teach ourselves or to discover things along the way

It’s not unusual for two-or-more gay men, or two-or-more lesbian women, to come together and have very different views on what sex is.

We’ll meet to discuss in a safe, comfortable environment, what sex means to the both of you, and to find ways to help you both enjoy each other sexually.

LGBT? (Q? I? A? +?)

L: Lesbian

G: Gay

B: Bisexual

T: Trans* (e.g. transgender, transexual, transwomen, transmen) ~ although the use of the asterix is falling out of favour now.

Q: Queer, or Questioning one’s sexuality.

I: Intersex.

A: Asexual.

+: Anyone and everyone including at least 47 other adjectives 👍🏻

As a counsellor Dean is interested in working with you in counselling regardless of your identity, orientation, preferences or kink. Whatever makes you comfy we will respect. Whatever makes you uncomfortable we will try and improve upon. You’re a fellow human being and Dean will treat you as such.

Location Image+44-56-0366-3067£30-£130
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Got a Question about LGBT/QIA+ Counselling?

Come and ask... whatever question you have about couple and/or group counselling for gay, lesbian, bisexual, aromatic, asexual and mixed-orientation relationships you might have, get in touch today to discuss your needs…

Private Counselling Services Designed for the LGBTQ+ Community. Available Exclusively to Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, ASexual, ARomantic, Mixed & Queer Couples, and Established Polyamorous Groups - serving the UK Nationwide over Zoom & Skype, plus locations in and around central Havant, Petersfield to Waterlooville, Cosham to Portsmouth & Southsea, Southampton to Chichester, Fareham to Gosport, Hayling Island, Emsworth, Westbourne, Rowland's Castle, stretching westwards to Bournemouth, eastwards towards Brighton & Hove and northwards towards Liverpool, Manchester and Hull. For local residents anywhere in between, across the whole UK, and regularly further afield abroad!