Is your relationship as dependable as you hope it is? Here are ten questions you and your partner need to ask today!

The Ten Questions Every LGBTQ+ Couple must ask themselves…

11 Aug, 2023Front Page Latest

As an LGBTQ+ couple, throuple or polycule, you may have some concerns about your relationship and your partner(s)? Would it help if you and your partner(s) could ask some insightful questions that could alleviate your worries, and that may also highlight what needs to be addressed (sooner rather than later)?

Let me help by sharing with you that embarking on a journey of discovery within your partnership can actually be as exhilarating as it can be enlightening. Do not be afraid!

Let me offer you this thoughtful scenario:

Ask these questions whilst sat under a star-lit sky…you and your loved one have a heartfelt conversation in a peaceful place, under a star-lit sky. You both explore the intricate nature of your emotions, dreams, and aspirations that have bound you together since you first met. By asking each other thoughtfully evaluating questions, you’re not just unraveling the enigmatic layers of your partnership, but you’re also creating a space where unspoken desires might find a voice. In finding expression, listened to with genuine curiosity, flourishes in your connection can bloom, and difficulties can be embraced.

The following ten questions serve as a compass, expertly guiding you through a maze of your relationship behaviour, emotions and responses. They will assist you in discovering the strengths that make up your bond, and illuminate the corners that may require a little more light. This introspective journey is about creating a roadmap for your future together, not just understanding where you are now.

Your journey into self-discovery within your relationship is waiting for you. This trip can help you grow, rediscover yourself, and make your love stronger and even more resilient.

Are we ready?

Ten Enlightening Questions to Discuss with your Partner(s)

  1. Communication. – Ask each other: “Are we able to communicate openly with each other about our feelings, needs, and concerns, or do we often feel misunderstood or ignored when we try to communicate?”
  2. Conflict Resolution. – Ask each other: “How do we handle disagreements and conflicts? Do we find ourselves stuck in repetitive patterns of arguing without finding a resolution together?”
  3. Emotional Connection. – Ask each other: “Do we feel emotionally connected and supported by one another? Are we able to share our vulnerabilities without fear of receiving judgment?”
  4. Intimacy. – Ask each other: “How satisfied are we with our physical and emotional intimacy? Are there any barriers or challenges that we’re facing in this area?”
  5. Shared Goals. – Ask each other: “Are our individual life goals and aspirations aligned, or do we find ourselves growing apart in terms of how we view our future(s)?”
  6. Trust and Honesty. – Ask each other: “Do we trust each other a little, a lot, or fully? Are we honest about our actions, thoughts, and feelings? Are there any breaches of trust that we can address together?”
  7. Respect and Equality. – Ask each other: “Do we treat each other with respect and equality? Do we value each other’s opinions and decisions? Do power imbalances exist between us?”
  8. Life Stressors. – Ask each other: “How well do we handle external stressors such as work, family, finances, life changes, and other challenges? Do these stressors strain our relationship a little, a lot, or to breaking point?”
  9. Emotional Well-being. – Ask each other: “Are both of us generally happy and fulfilled within this relationship, or do we feel regularly drained, unhappy, and/or emotionally unfulfilled together?”
  10. Efforts and Commitment. – Ask each other: “Are we both willing to invest time, effort, and commitment into improving the parts of our relationship that need attention? Are we open to seeking professional help that can help facilitate us in areas that we struggle with?”

Helpful Things to Remember

  • These questions are not meant to encourage argumentative conversation!
  • They are meant to encourage curiosity and interest.
  • Through curiosity one can have an open conversation with ones partner.
If answers to these questions indicate some significant challenges to be addressed, or they highlight ongoing distress in the relationship that you both were (kinda!) aware of already, seeking counselling from a qualified and experienced couples counsellor such as Dean Richardson MNCPS (Accred/Reg) can provide a safe and constructive environment for you both to discuss and address these issues. Counselling can help you work towards a healthier, happier partnership when some issues won’t go away.

Hope this helped xx

Gay Male Couple
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